Editorial

Violence against men in the context of romantic relationships

Dalia Carreño Dueñas

Received: 16 de junio de 2021–Accepted: 26 de octubre de 2021–Published: Publicado: 1 diciembre de 2021

How to cite this article in APA: Carreño Dueñas, D. (2021). Violence against men in the context of romantic relationships. Ciencia y Academia, (2), 15-17. https://doi.org/10.21501/2744838X.4257

One might think that violence against men has certain scenarios, which justify it, one of these is war, where confrontation in one way or another is understandable, perhaps even ends up being acceptable, according to the reasons that are put forward. But the context of aggression, within love life, is lived by men in a strange, exotic way and often ends up being the object of ridicule, because it is a distortion of the imaginaries, about virility, strength, insensitivity, and all the pressures that the social set demands of it. Hence, at the moment, when a male victim dares to denounce some type of violence against him, committed by his partner is seen with a certain distrust; and does not receive all the protection, measures, and attention of Amparo, as if it were received by the female victim. This legal panorama is the expression, of the portentous patriarchal tradition of collective life, of how, as social beings inserted in a culture, we interact.

Intersubjective relations between men and women are not always simple, peaceful, and smooth; Much of the time humanity has strengthened its ties in a difficult way, with this it realizes the complex mediations that they entail, and that evidence the shared construction, although not defined, of what affection is: that translates into love, hate, violence, and desire for the other.

Humanity since its dawn, at least from the constructions of theogony, presents as essential the image of a founding couple, but it does not mean that this original marriage, is harmonious, without disputes, it seems that, on the contrary, it is conflict, revenge, infidelity that prevails; thus are presented among others Zeus and Hera, Mother Earth and Uranus, Cronus and Rhea, it is striking for the thematic interest of this issue, that these first stories, evidence strong, vengeful, jealous, destructive goddesses, who can darken the male gods with whom they are united.

In these accounts there is no reproach or censure of violence against men by their partners, on the contrary, certain merit is described, or justice in the actions of revenge of them, it seems that they have reasons and that the goddesses institute a kind of judgment, a punishment to their husbands for their unhealthy acts, in this way the story leads to justify their actions. This divine marriage, in a contradictory way, oversees founding order and stability to the world of men.

It could well be said that this pair of male and female gods are the reflection of normal human conflict, even the mirror of the worst moments of the love crisis, which accompanies every relationship between people, even more so when love is passed to hate. It is striking, the violent revenge on the part of the goddesses, who perform it through their children, or the children of their partners, who help them to consummate the punishment against their husbands; this is the case of Zeus, who oversees the reparation of Rhea, his mother. And Hera, prey to jealousy for the ravings of her husband, directs her hatred by punishing the children that he conceived with other demi goddesses, or human, e.g. with Hercules, to whom he gave innumerable evils.

Therefore, female violence against their partners is not something that has just manifested itself, these millenary texts express this reality, which in the light of the twenty-first century become important because of the challenges, which involve assuming the deconstruction of roles, of what is understood as man and woman, of how roles are played within love relationships. And what is expected, must be the behaviors to be followed, or at least those that are accepted and appropriate. So, the aggressions of female partners against men go beyond physical injury and can be deployed in outrages against their manhood, their ability, their intelligence; there is underground violence that hurts, undermines, and humiliates, which, because it does not leave a trace or physical evidence, is not understood as such.

Perhaps because the male being has the imaginary associated with insensitivity to subjective aggression, intersubjective, that which determines the intimacy of the individual being. And that, in the contexts of the predominance of cultural machismo, it is assumed as tolerable or fair, even proportionate because it is the female victim, who has claimed aggression against her, and constitutes a vigilante response, within the conflict, in which women usually make up the weak part. Therefore, the injured man, assaulted in his affections, touched in his privacy by his partner, must overcome the imaginaries to, in the first place, recognize that he has been violated, that he has been violated. Thus, with this first step, new masculinities emerge, roles in which weakness, insecurity, fear, pain regarding self-love and worth are admitted. This masculinity arises to assume, express, give spaces for sensitivity, and be recognized in roles such as parenting, household chores, and all household activities.

We may reconstruct, masculinity, beyond the mere males, where other roles have a place, which allows us to overcome the dichotomous: weakness-power, submission-obedience, master-slave, and there yes, understand that violence, aggression has no gender, but is suffered equally, and that therefore there must be protections and safeguards for all.

Conflict of interest

The author declares the absence of a conflict of interest with an institution or association of any kind.

Notas de autor

Dalia Carreño Dueñas

Doctora en Derecho, Universidad de Buenos Aires, magíster en Evaluación en Educación, especialista en Derecho Penal y Ciencias Forenses, licenciada en Filosofía y Letras, licenciada en Filosofía y Ciencias, abogada de la Universidad Santo Tomás. Docente titular de la Universidad Santo Tomás, Bogotá-Colombia. Contacto: daliacarreno@usantotomas.edu.co